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Posted: Monday, January 8, 2018 7:29:37 AM
Rank: Story Moderator

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 746
Location: lost in the ozone west of Apache Junction
Here are some perks of reaching 60 or being over 70 and heading towards 80 and Beyond.

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 8 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 5 PM.
9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

No matter what happens, pizza will always be there for you. Thick and thin, in crust we trust.'

Schemers Scheme -- young women talking about young men

OF WAR, AND PEACE, AND MARY BETH: my contest winner, honest

For Whom the Good Tolls an 'RR' and it's short, no kidding

Posted: Monday, January 8, 2018 11:44:16 AM
Rank: Forum Facilitator

Joined: 9/29/2012
Posts: 1,966
Location: OZ [Prairie Village KS]
cheap movies

Posted: Monday, January 8, 2018 12:57:04 PM
Rank: Forum Facilitator

Joined: 3/15/2011
Posts: 3,124
Location: Only my friends know...
12. No one cares how you dress
13. Groaning is a language
14. No one questions you when you use the "I forgot" card.
15. You can claim you are on Social Security when someone asks you for money.

Posted: Tuesday, January 9, 2018 10:15:01 AM
Rank: Forum Facilitator

Joined: 9/12/2013
Posts: 1,992
Location: Southern Indiana, United States
16. Your electric mattress pad is your best friend on cold nights.
17. Learning new things means you have to forget five others to make room.
18. Shaving is nor longer a daily requirement.
19. You can get your weekly cardio workout by walking into a spider web.

"Them ain't no militia, that's the Army of the Potomac!"

Posted: Tuesday, January 9, 2018 3:14:35 PM
Rank: Rookie Scribe

Joined: 12/10/2017
Posts: 3
Location: United Kingdom
20. You can nod and smile saying, “yes dear” to everything with a twinkle, even if you haven’t heard a word. (Disclaimer: Borderline 95% success rate, not to be confused with sarcasm.)
Posted: Tuesday, January 9, 2018 5:07:14 PM
Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/12/2014
Posts: 1,634

Posted: Wednesday, January 10, 2018 1:03:48 AM
Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 8/25/2016
Posts: 814
22. You can ask a nice lady (or gentleman, depending on your gender and predilection) to massage your aching knees without embarrassment.
23. You no longer need to bother with socks since you can’t bend down to put them on anyway.
24. You can fall asleep in front of the television and no longer have to claim you were just resting your eyes.

For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. Hebrews 4:12
Posted: Sunday, January 5, 2020 5:36:02 PM
Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/12/2014
Posts: 1,634

Posted: Sunday, January 5, 2020 7:17:17 PM
Rank: Active Ink Slinger

Joined: 5/19/2018
Posts: 41
Location: Near Mipple City
25. You paid off your mortgage just in time to pay the new property tax on your home.
26. You can still beat your children at card games but they are learning how to distract you.
27. Absolutely no one asks you to go ice skating for fear you will fall and hurt yourself. You can stay in where it's warm.

I live, I love, I perform, and I lament.
Posted: Monday, January 6, 2020 5:38:04 PM
Rank: Forum Guru

Joined: 1/12/2014
Posts: 1,634

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